Thursday, August 16, 2012

Crazy, Strange Lover


Like on the brink of a precipice
Like bungee jumping,
Without a rope
Life with you seems.

Your crazy kind of love,
So haunting and hypnotising
Creeping up on me
Catching me unawares.

I could just keep watching you,
Studying your every move,
Gazing at the depth of your actions,
Marvelling at your varying intricacies.

You trick me at,
Every corner.
Keep me guessing
Building my anticipation.

So exquisitely gentle one moment,
Rough and brutal the next.
Making me ache with yearning
Torturing me, baiting me.

So guarded in your emotions,
Watchful in your choices,
Studying me,
As I study you.

Oh, what games we play.
Cat and mouse games.
Testing our limits.
Testing our love?

To what end do we travel?
Through this crazy journey of love,
Down dark, mysterious lands,
Deep and intoxicating.

Lets loose ourselves,
In this dangerous form of love.
Find ourselves in
Each other’s death.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Riddle me This


Come, drop some hints
Here and there.
Let us pick up
On the trail.
Follow each other,
To new discoveries.
Find some new
Knicks and knacks.
What makes you tick,
What makes me groan.
Run through
The jig saw puzzle.
Piece together,
The maze.
Let me keep you guessing,
Just as you do to me.
Riddle me this,
Riddle you that.
Unravel each other,
One layer by layer.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

I am a Woman


I can be kind. I can be gentle. I can be nurturing. I can be sexual. I can be deep. I can be frivolous. I can be sensitive. I can be cold. I can be a mother. I can be a vixen. I can be selfish. I can be self-sacrificing. I can be perceptive. I can be walled. I can be loving. I can be cruel. I can be steadfast. I can be mysterious. I can be solid. I can be ephemeral. I can be whimsical. I can be committed. I can feel what you feel. I can choose not to. I can see your very dreams. I can weave my own. I can build your castle. I can break your home. I can bear your burden. I can walk away without a word. I can paint fantasies. I can bring you back to reality. I can be your joy. I can be your misery. I can be your happiest dream. I can be your worst nightmare. I can be strong. I can be insecure. I can be demeaning. I can be fortifying. I can be your backbone. I can be your safety net. I can be your muse. I can be your inspiration. I can be your godmother. I can be your baby-sitter. I can be your confidante. I can be your guide. I can be your enemy. I can be your folly. I can be your mistake. I can be your music. I can be your dance. I can be your poetry. I can be your drama. I can be your depression. I can be your hate. I can be your obsession. I can be your itch. I can be your sleep. I can be your insomnia. I can be your laziness. I can be your energy. I can be your calm. I can be your agitation. I can be your love. I can be your despair. I can be your laughter. I can be your tears. I can be your weakness. I can be your grit. I can be your foundation. I can be your superstructure. I can be your façade. I can be your secret. I can be your light. I can be your darkness. I can be your heights. I can be your depths. I can be your world. I can be your all. Or nothing at all… 

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Reaching for the Stars


Through restless meanderings
Through entropic choices
Winding our convoluted ways
Through the paths of life.

To find some significance
Some glittery, others staid
Looking through tunnels
Feeling for shortcuts.

Suffering humiliation
Facing failures and rejection
Like busybodies
Playing bumping cars.

Crossing paths,
Making tiny differences
Yet the dissatisfaction
Of not being what we’d like to be.

Superficial mannerisms
Stigmatic reputations
Envious lifestyles
Bitter prices.

Looking at the wrong places.
Working the wrong jobs.
Befriending the wrong “friends”.
Seeing the wrong vision.

Where are we lost?
While reaching for the stars?
Selling our souls
For the seemingly better.

Bargaining with the devil
While reaching for the stars
Bartering our selves
For the seemingly enchanting.

Making irreversible decisions
Beyond the point of no-return
With heavy consequences
And life-changing scenarios.

Lets just wait a while
To truly consider
Our deepest needs
Our innate desires.

Lets just wait a while
To check our compass
Orient our direction
And correct past transgressions.

Lets just wait a while
Before we stand up
Stretch out
And reach for the stars.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Abandoned Dreams


We leave them behind,
Trailing along behind us,
Marking a long line
Of ambitions and memories.

We leave them behind,
In our pursuit of importance,
To gather dust by,
The wayside.

Forgotten futures
That could have been,
Just passing before our eyes,
Like a snapshot movie,
Of memories.

A little ode to such,
Abandoned dreams.
A minute of remembrance,
To such abandoned dreams.
Like unborn children,
That could never be,
We shed tears of sadness,
For that which we left to bleed.

Friday, April 1, 2011

He loves, She loves.


She looked at him as He peeled away at his clothes. The ominous light from the street lamp cast eerie shadows, rendering a sense of surrealism to the scene that was unfolding before her eyes. They moved closer as He kept undressing every piece of clothing. Piece by piece. Hypnotically. They were growing closer. And the merging into one amorphous, indistinct mass happened in one fluid motion.
The dark shapes kept moving and changing in the orange street lamp filtering through the window. The velvety intimacy reached a feverish pitch and gradually subsided.
They were done in. For the first time.

*     *             *

“I didn’t know what I was doing”, He said to a rapt audience. She was lying on the bed, sunlight from the window filtering into the room, watching him as He spoke. Her attention concentrated on every word He was uttering.
“She beckoned to me with a wag of her forefinger. I went closer and suddenly she pulled me closer to her by my waistband.”
“She then asked me: ‘Do you know what I’m going to do next?’ I shook my head, in a daze, unable to believe what was happening. I had no idea what was happening to me. She then unzipped my pants and touched my penis. She was playing with it, when she looked up at me and asked, ‘Do you know what else you can do with this apart from peeing?’ I shook my head again. And then, for the next five minutes, l had a mind-blowing experience that changed my life forever. In a lot of ways, she is the first woman I ever loved.”
“How old were you?” She asked, in a contemplative way.
“Twelve.”
“And she was your aunt?”
“Yes.”

*             *             *

She looked at The Friend as they were having sex. Yes, they did have a strange connection. Yes they do.
“So do you like it when the guy pins you down and you’re struggling to break away from him?” The Friend asks her with great interest.
“Yes, yes, I do!” She replies with increasing excitement.
“Come, watch us masturbate.” says He to The Friend.
They’re doing it to an audience. Oh yes, they love it. The excitement of having someone watch them. The sexual control they have over The Friend.
“Slap him!” The Friend instructs her. She does. The Friend groans in painful pleasure.
Yes, they were best friends – He and The Friend. Yes, She and He were together. Yes, The Friend knew more about her than He did.

*             *             *
“Sure, you can date him if you want to. I’ll fix you both up.” He abruptly gets up and leaves as soon as He tells her that.
She looks at him, amusement written on her face. She runs across the study tables in the library to catch up with his long, quick strides.
“I wasn’t too keen on it anyway”, She says nonchalantly, catching up with him.
“You know, I wouldn’t want you to feel any form of obligation towards me” He suddenly stops and turns to her with a smile. It was a brilliant smile. It could melt a bar of chocolate from a hundred paces. There was...something forced about it though. Dazzling. As always. But…
He abruptly turns away and walks away. She calls out to him. He turns and looks at her. She just looks at him, unable to say what she wanted to. He raises his eyebrows into a quizzical expression. She slowly shakes her head, biting her lower lip. He turns away, like something in him was lost.

*             *             *

“Did you know, your name means ‘ear’?” She asks him.
“No!” He disagrees vehemently.
“Then what does it mean?” She asks him, studying his reactions and soaking in every expression on his face. “Helper? Warrior?”
“It means Rays of the Sun” He replies with a smug expression. “You can take your pick.”
“But isn’t ‘ear’ fascinating?” She probes.
“Hmm...why.” He knew where it was headed, but He wasn’t going to take up the bait.
“It is...well...” She trails off, unable to complete what She wanted to say.
“And why are you searching for meanings of my name?” He confronts.
She laughs a careless laugh, “Oh, it was very random.”
“Alright, I gotta go!” She announces suddenly.
It was his turn to laugh. Though, a knowing laugh.

*             *             *

Monday, December 20, 2010

Catharsis

“Oh! You should look at this” she says as she waves her newfound book in her arms.

He looks up at her distractedly, himself engrossed in something very deep and meaningful. For him, at least.

“Don’t you like this?” she asks enthusiastically.

No, no. He couldn’t be bothered right now. He was already under a lot of pressure. No, he couldn’t look up to enjoy the small things that life has to offer. Everything else was insignificant compared to what he was facing.

She looks disappointed at his lukewarm response, but she doesn’t say anything. She understood. She had to be understanding.

“So, would you like to go to the Beer Fest this evening?” she tries once more.

Beat of silence. It stretches. It gets uncomfortable. She tries to not look crestfallen, but tears were welling up in her eyes.

“Well, wouldn’t you at least tell me something? I’d like to know.” Finally summoning the courage to confront him.

“Look..” he says, without being able to make eye contact with her, “I just need some time. Please don’t ask me these questions.”

“Alright,” she approaches cautiously, “I don’t want to be prying, but..I’d just like to know. That’s all.”

He gets up from the park bench and walks away into the sunset. She watches him as he walks away and disappears into the evening. With every step of his hunched demeanour, she could see her life slipping away. Of what life she thought might be with him. She could see it all falling apart, but really couldn’t do anything about it. She waits till the disappointment settles down in her heart. The sun sets into the evening, gradually. Until it gets quite dark and she suddenly takes note of her surroundings.
My god, it is quite late, she thinks to herself. With a sigh, she picks herself up and prepares to leave for the life that does await her. To the welcoming arms of daily routine. At least, these things need me, she thinks to herself as she walks away into the twinkling night of the city.